D E B U S S Y 'S A#: April 2007

04282007 | The one thing

If there's one thing in the world I'm good at, that would be waiting.
If there's one thing I want to do the last, that would be waiting.
If there's one thing I have to do yet now, it is waiting.

image above; Edward Hopper, Rooms by the sea from www.artinthepicture.com

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m e m o i r e | M. R o s t r o p o v i c h , 1927-2007

Suffering is essential for art. You know creators, composers, need a palette for life,
a color for life. If he (is) only happy with his life,
I think that he (does not fully) understand what is happiness.

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04242007 | Who's your favorite composer?

This is a good question. Apparently it seems to be a problem of not my own though, hence somebody suggested a solution. You like what you have the most. Simple? Maybe. But here is a condition. Unconsciously. You have crush on composers that you have bought the most of the records without intention.

Bach, Mozart and Beethoven aside - as these would be the most for almost of you whether you like them or not, then my answer goes to... Schubert and Tchaikovsky. It's kind of inconceivable. I mean, I of course like them but just as normal amount as all the other music lovers would do. I've never thought I had special interests on them. Look at you. It's too melancholic! Why couldn't it be like Mendelssohn or Rossini?

Well, I might have to take this result. Maybe it might reflect my mind quite correctly. But I don't think I'm going to answer as them without hesitation when I'm asked this question yet. Well, for today at least. Because I got the highest record on the scrabble today. It was 84 and the word was 'farther'. It was pretty much a beginner's luck as you'd see if you do the math, but still. It was really really great.

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04232007 | Belated joining

After listening to Mahler's, spring finally came along onto me.

I carefully took out my camera and photographed the first ones of this spring.

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04122007 | A bit of sense

I'm sad for the distance between you and me.

♩playing: rainy day
Youn Sun Nah,vocal | Kwang Min Kim, comp.

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04112007 | Alas, Korean

There are few things to what I can say 'absolutely no' and this is one of them even without thinking twice. Institutions in my country have been cited TWO times in this SHORT article described on the issue. What a pleasant surprise it is!

I actually wrote about this a few months ago privately, and now Ms.Suh's mention made me speak more publicly if I can say so. I'm totally oppose that making it mandatory something that universities increase English classes in their curriculum and college students must take them for the degrees.

I don't want to enumerate here how important language is from the fact that it makes us distinguish from other animals on earth. We already use it, everyday. It controls the way we think. I would not be of course a Frenchwoman as I speak French. But I am not Korean either as long as I speak and think in other languages. Language is culture, idea, and it's just about everything.

This is why so many Americans - and me, I admit- become helpless as hearing British English accent. This is again why British English tend to use '-re' in place of '-er' as in American English. This also explains why Japan so tormented us to use its tongue during the colonial era. This is why King Sejong put his every effort to achieve certain level on our mother tongue in every possible field of academic after he created it.

Colleges and universities play a critical role in the society as higher educational system. We lose more than earn if those are not functioning as what we expected to. And I would like to believe they know what is the first priority. Why would they take the responsibility for students' abilities of speaking English? Since when they are so obligated for their students? Teaching English is none of their business. If English is that necessary, having students take English exam is good enough just as they generally do for college entrance exams.

I hope they do realize what is the right thing to do. It's not a problem of 'having less efficiency or effectiveness of knowledge transfer' nor reality of 'seeing the benefits eventually'.

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04092007 | Just what I need

Artist's Room in Neulengbach | Egon Schiele

1911 | oil on wood | 40x32cm

Historisches der Stadt Wien

A piece of isolation, but that two pieces of consolation

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04052007 | About guys like Michael Scofield

He rarely speaks. There’s less explanation and more “trust me”. And he suddenly gives such a cold attitude when people would not do that.

My understanding is, just like Sara said, “trust me means absolutely zero” but not only ‘inside the walls’ but also in the other part of the world. I hardly believe people saying “trust me” too often. It’s not just limited to those stories like “You trust me? Come on” and ending up being dumped after one night. I think if they really have something to prove, they gotta do it by acting it not by saying it. I will trust ‘em after they actually show something that I can believe. And, unfortunately, it’s too hard to find someone who being turned out keeping his word.

So, Sara is so lucky to live in TV there. I’m 99.9% sure that someone like Michael wouldn’t be real. She is luckily stupid to believe a person like inmate and yet I can’t blame her. Ironically, despite I’m so wise to be aware of all, I’m jealous of her being in that situation, making that decision.

Trusting and being trusted really matters to me. More than loving and being loved, sometimes. It’s basically because, I guess, my parents both love me a lot and not believe me at all. I’ve been raised that way and I’m very careful to believe someone. But sometimes I’m so scared that I have only one person to trust. I’m so scared that I’m eagerly looking for one to trust with little faith because I already know the truth.

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04022007 | The long drought

It’s been a while. The drought in my mind. I am always sad when spring comes. Being sad after season of SAD. Quite an oxymoron. More pathetic, I forget how to tear now. I used to cry in silence listening to Schumann’s Dichterliebe in this time of year. I wanted to be a person who has a mild external appearance but a strong, confident mind all the time. But I am becoming a person having a weak spirit along with an insecure outer appearance which is exactly opposite to what I’m trying to be. I feel empty. Have no idea what I am doing by now. So you will never know how happy I am it’s still cold out there, there’s yellow dust all up in the air protecting me from arriving of damn spring.